-How do people miss the last few questions on a test?  After every exam, when everyone is talking about what they thought about the test, there’s always that one kid who realizes that he missed the last five questions because he didn’t look on the last page.  How dumb are you?

-Why don’t I have any classes that have movies as assignments?  I have this friend who is never studying, never doing work, because he’s a Film Studies major and all he has to do is watch movies.  What kind of bullshit classes are these?  Hey, how about you give me an A for sitting on my ass and doing nothing all day?  Every time I see my friend is in his room watching TV I’m like, “What are you up to?”  And he’s like, “Not much, just doing homework.”  Ridiculous.

-I live with nine other guys in a four-story house and no one gets the door.  Ever.  The kids on the fourth floor claim that they’re too far away.  The kids on the second floor complain that they always have to get the door and now refuse to do it.  And the kids on the third floor are just plain lazy.  We hate getting the door so much that if anyone comes over more than once, we just make them a key.

-My house also has a bit of a mouse problem.  Seems that some of my housemates think that leaving food, trash, and human waste on the floor is OK.  Our rodents have so much to feed on that they have evolved into a species of super-mice.  Not only do they flip over traps and steal whole sandwiches, when we go to sleep at night they go to mouse school and have mouse parties.  There are police mice and teacher mice and even mice that drive around in little mouse cars.  I think they’re plotting to take over the house.  Now if only we could get them to answer the door…