Was I the only kid who was super anxiety issues when it came time for the deaf test? "Oh shit...am I supposed to be hearing a beep now? ..Why the fuck did they wait until 5th grade to make sure I'm not deaf?"
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I'd always just watch to see when they turned the knob.
Posted by: CodeE42
36 days ago
what a sensible solution...i was far too panicky to think of shit like that.
Posted by: dasskeptische
36 days ago
You were Super Anxiety Issues? That's like the worst super power ever, next to Super Nose Hair Grower Boy, but one up from Hairball Man
Posted by: Danish
36 days ago
-My sister and I have often debated which is most irritating: talking to our parents when they’re both on the line together, talking to our parents one right after the other, or telling a story to one parent, only to have them relay it incorrectly to the other. The answer is a toss-up, but I’ve realized – as we stand halfway between Mother’s Day and Father’s Day – that it is possible to have a strong relationship with your parents and simultaneously be infuriated by them. Some twentysomethings can hardly bear their parents. Others treat their moms and dads like sisters or brothers (which is weird). When it comes to the delicate parent/child relationship, though, I’m kind of in the middle – appreciating their unconditional support, while wishing they were just a little less annoying about it.
-I essentially serve as the buffer between my parents and the Internet. If my mom has a question about the latest episode of “Lost,” she calls me, I look it up on Lostpedia, and then give her the scoop. When my dad wants a book, he calls me, I order it on Amazon, and have it sent to him. It’s all very efficient – for them.
-Back in Ruminations #111, I bemoaned the fact that my parents don’t know how to text message. I got a surprising number of responses from readers who said this was a blessing, not a curse. Apparently, once parents learn how to text message, they don’t stop. And the last thing I need is my dad texting in his book orders. Plus it took me about three years to get my mom to configure her Bluetooth headset properly – I’m afraid if she hits any button but “Call” all my hard work will go to shit.
-I think my mom is starting to come to the realization that I will not be giving her grandchildren anytime soon. I’m very honest – I tell her I don’t plan on getting married until at least my mid-thirties, let alone having kids. And you can just see that look on her face – that look that says, “I raised you and put up with all your bullshit and you can’t do this one lousy fucking thing for me?” As if summarizing every episode of “Lost” for her isn’t enough.
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