-Ah, October.  Autumn in the city.  It’s getting a little chilly, a bit more overcast.  The Yankees are out, but alas, life goes on.  The tourists are taking a reprieve until Christmas.  The girls are taking off those big sunglasses that make them look like mosquitoes and packing away those stupid open-toe sandals that cut their feet all summer.  The guys, well, the guys are still up to their usual shenanigans.  And I’m no exception.  I go about my daily routine as usual, no matter what the weather: Sleep, Eat, Drink, Hit on Chicks, repeat as necessary.  And I’m not the only one.  Hoards of recent college grads across the city share my routine.  We are, after all, twentysomething.

-What is twentysomething?  Twentysomething means you’re out of college, you’ve gone through your phase where you wished you still were in college, but now you’re done with that too.  You’re a “real person.”  But not quite.  As of today, none of my friends are engaged, none have kids, and none are within three years of either.  We are the gap between college and marriage, between zero responsibility and total responsibility.  And we fucking love it.  This is our story.

-My apartment is furnished by a well-known foreign designer.  His name is IKEA.  I bought a funky, comfortable chair at IKEA.  I thought it was different.  I have so far seen the same chair in at least six different twentysomething’s apartments.  I didn’t realize it came in so many different colors.  This IKEA guy must be making a fortune.

-The Mayor says we’re not supposed to recycle glass anymore.  I still haven’t figured this one out.  My apartment has a trash chute on each floor.  I live on the eleventh.  I walked to the chute the other day and dropped down an empty handle of SKYY, two bottles of Stoli, and twelve Coors Light longnecks.  The shattering explosion of glass as it ricocheted down eleven floors was deafening.  A woman came out of an apartment down the hall nursing her baby and gave me a dirty look.  “It’s not me, it’s the Mayor,” I said.  She didn’t buy it.