Aaron Karo
Username: Karo
Gender: Dude
Age: 29
Location: Los Angeles
Hometown: Plainview, New York
College: University of Pennsylvania '01
“From the page to the stage, Aaron Karo’s insights into the twentysomething mind have secured his place as the irreverent voice of a generation.”
Hello and welcome to my site! My name is Aaron Karo (pronounced KAY-ro) and I founded Ruminations.com in August 2008. This is my story.
In 1997, as a freshman at the University of Pennsylvania, I sent a funny email to twenty of my buddies from high school. That email spawned a regular “email column” entitled Ruminations that, through forwarding and word-of-mouth, soon attracted readers nationwide.
Simon & Schuster published compilations of the column in my two books, Ruminations on College Life and Ruminations on Twentysomething Life.
After a brief detour on Wall Street, I began performing stand-up in 2002. Thanks to my amazing fans, I now headline sold out shows at theaters across the country.
In 2005, I moved from New York City to Los Angeles to write sitcoms, perform stand-up, and touch fake breasts.
In August 2008, I launched Ruminations.com to enable my fans to write their own ruminations and share them with the world. Later that month, I performed on the Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson on CBS. And in December 2008, Comedy Central Records released my all-new stand-up album, Just Go Talk to Her.
More than eleven years after I started writing, I continue to email out Ruminations every other Monday. What began with twenty friends has now been read by hundreds of thousands of people around the world.
I hope you enjoy my site and please contact me if you have any questions or comments!
Click here to view my complete column archive dating back to 1997!
Ruminations
There is no slideshow setting that could possibly allow me to plow through the barrage of pictures you just sent me fast enough.
I still keep a ping pong ball in my apartment. Just in case.
Why does the first speed of fast-forward on my DVR seem slower than normal playback?
I am either the worst or the best possible houseguest. I either get too drunk and vomit in your bathroom, or hook up and never make it back to your place at all.
I officially call dibs on dressing as “Joe the Plumber” for Halloween.
I will never be hospitalized for “exhaustion.”
Instead of smoking a cigarette after sex, I check my BlackBerry. It doesn’t smell bad, it won’t cause cancer, but it has the same soothing effect.
More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can’t wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that’s not only better, but also more directly involves me.
Mixed drinks are like masturbation: only you know exactly how you like it.
I'm on a plane about to take off and I'm experimenting with submitting a rumination from my BlackBerry. I'm stuck in a middle seat and, sadly, see no mile high opportunities at all...
Dear Future Wife: the most important job you will ever have is to kill spiders for me.
How disappointing is it when you’re Facebook-stalking someone and you finally find a picture that they’re tagged in, but when you roll over the photo it turns out they’re not the cute one?
In a way, I totally understand where Brett Favre is coming from. Sometimes in life there’s just a limited window of opportunity to do the things you love. It’s kind of like the way I feel about being young, drunk, single, and stupid.
Please don’t take your shoes off when you walk into my apartment if your feet are dirtier than your flip-flops.
Ever feel like August is such a bullshit month that you shouldn't even have to pay rent?
The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There’s nothing like being made to feel like a fat bastard before dinner.
This is the very first rumination to ever be posted to the site! It’s kind of weird to launch a new web site and be the only registered user. It's kind of like throwing a party and hoping that people will actually show up. In both instances, the only thing you can do is wait – and know that no matter what happens, in about two hours you’ll be outrageously drunk anyway.