Ruminations
A job has to be really bad when even the coffee makes you mad at coming into work.
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Whenever my microwave is finished cooking whatever leftovers, frozen meal, or popcorn I put in it; the display says "ENJOY". It is kind of comforting that it cares so much that I enjoy me reheated meal. Even if I burn it or it sucks the second day..."ENJOY" comes up and it makes me like it just a little bit more.
Ruminations is like the Seinfeld of the internet. It really is about nothing, but encompasses every aspect of your life.
No matter what time I get at work, I want to leave at the same time...exactly 5 minutes after I showed up.
It is ironic how you see a Mac commercial every 20 minutes and the latest one is a parody of Windows advertisement spending. You hardly ever see a Windows commercial, and if you do it has a B-list celebrity in it, just like the kid in the Mac commercial.
Every time I go to the gym locker room, I always get the locker next to the old guy stripped bare-naked coming out of the shower. Exactly what I want before I go back to work and eat lunch. Saggy old man balls in your face is not an image you can get rid with a ham sandwich, even with potato chips on it.
Gym rats annoy me in their condescending-you-are-not-as-fit-as-me kind of way. But non-regular gym goers annoy me in that they have no gym etiquette. Do not sit on a machine you are not using and talk on your cell phone, do not grunt and strain trying to lift weights your gangly arms can not lift. And please use deodorant and a minimal use of cologne. Unless you are a girl in spandex, you can do whatever you want to do in front of me.
It really stresses me out seeing fat people eat more than me and drinking gallons upon gallons of coke. Please, put the fork down and take a walk.
Day 0: Aaron ruminated about the possibility of going 30 days without drinking. Well sure enough, a buddy said the same thing to me out one night. Then, I met a girl out at a bar saying she hadn't drank in over a month. So going by my rule of three, I have decided to go dry for the month of October. It is going to be a challenge and very few of my friends have confidence in me in doing it. We shall see over the month. And of course with last night being October Eve, I drank my fridge dry and woke up an hour late for work. Great start!
My mix drink of choice is bourbon and ginger ale. Why is it, no matter what bar I go to, the first drink is always weak; then the second could completely knock you on your ass?
I do not understand "muffin tops". Do girls understand that wearing jeans that are too tight do not make you look skinny? It does the opposite by giving you that fat roll over the top of your jeans. Just wear the correct size fitting jeans.
